The Journal of Ephemeral Inspiration

The Journal of Ephemeral Inspiration promises a neverending spew of pointless minutae, brilliant yet useless ideas, troublingly cruel commentary and emphatic musings on whatever shiny object happens to catch our collective eye. Always remember, hate the game, not the playa.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Food Of The Gods: The Fool's Gold Loaf

Pauline Nicholson, Elvis Presley's cook, who prepared the King's favorite peanut butter and fried banana sandwiches, died July 7 of cancer. She was 76.

For comfort food, you just couldn't beat the menu at Graceland. In addition to Pauline's aforementioned PB&Bs, there was ugly steak, meat loaf, mashed potatoes, onion gravy, poke greens, crowder peas, buttermilk biscuits, Wonder Bread, sweet potato pie, fruit cocktail with mini-marshmallows, and all the Diet Shasta you could want, all available 24 hours a day.

So in tribute to Pauline, the JEI would like to present our favorite Elvis recipe (sadly, not a Pauline invention, but a $50 specialty from the Colorado Gold Mine Company restaurant in Glendale, CO), as detailed in David Adler's book, "The Life & Cuisine of Elvis Presley." We're sure Pauline would have approved.

Fool's Gold Loaf

2 tablespoons butter
1 loaf Italian white bread
1 pound lean bacon
1 large jar Skippy smooth peanut butter
1 large jar Smucker's grape jelly

Preaheat the oven to 350ºF. Spread the butter generously over all sides of the loaf. Place bread on a baking sheet in the oven. Meanwhile, fry the bacon until it is crisp and drain it thoroughly on paper towels. Remove the loaf from the oven when it is evenly browned, after approximately 15 minutes. Slice the loaf lengthwise and hollow out the interior, leaving as much bread along the walls as desired. While the bacon is still warm, fill the insides of the loaf with peanut butter and jelly to taste. Arrange the bacon slices inside the cavity, or, if desired, layer the bacon slices between the peanut butter and jelly. Close the loaf. Serve.

Yield: 1 serving (Elvis), 8 to 10 servings (others)

Approximately 6250 calories.

Trivia Time: The last meal Elvis ate was four scoops of Sealtest ice cream and six Chips Ahoy! chocolate chip cookies.